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A common statement that I hear in my introductory coaching sessions, especially when stating areas of development is, “I am very emotional.” My first exclamatory reaction is, “Girl, wow you have awesome strength. Since when has being emotional become a weakness or area of development? Who has put this bizarre notion in our mind?”
The emergence of scientific management in the 19th century focused on designing organizational systems based on rationality to control or eliminate emotions.
The key is to recognize our emotions and be intelligent about it.
Even the yogic tradition of India, which has profoundly influenced the whole of the Orient through its absorption into Buddhism, posits the existence of three nadis or energy channels in the subtle body of the human being. The right channel (solar, yang energy) contains the qualities which would commonly be identified, in the West, with reasoning or intelligence or adaptation to the external world. The left channel (lunar, yin energy) contains the emotional half of our being and is concerned with internal things. The central channel has the quality of spiritual evolution. Therefore in terms of the three channels (nadis) and the three qualities that go with them (gunas), the word emotional intelligence appears to be a combination or balance of left and right channels.
The modern world owes a lot to Daniel Goleman, also known as father of Emotional Intelligence. In this world of supreme competitiveness, external distractions, race to success, I need it all etc. – it is extremely important to be aware of this valium aspect of our existence. EI ( Emotional Intelligence), not only helps us be a better person, it also helps us be more effective, efficient and successful in our professional sphere.
Explained in simple terminology Emotional Intelligence has 5 levels. The first three levels address Self and the last two levels address Inter Personal Relationship.
- Self Awareness This is the ability to recognize our emotional state in any situation, and be able to use this knowledge to drive our thoughts and action. Therefore, our thoughts, words and action are better informed and channelized.
- Self Regulation This is the ability to take ownership of our emotions and help us to avoid being an emotional victim. What an empowering state to be in!
- Self Motivation Self motivation allows us to use our emotions to affect positive change in our life through dedicated pursuit of our goals, no matter what the obstacles are in our way.
- Empathy- This competency of EI is the ability to feel what another person is feeling and to be aware of the other persons perspective and emotional state of mind.
- Nurturing Relationship This is the ability to dance with ease, grace and compassion with our relationship with others around us. Interest and compassion for others always form a solid foundation for that.
Today, when the world is talking about EI based leadership, women are at an advantage to lead. We are naturally born to be more in touch with our emotions. What we need is awareness and an inclination to leverage this special advantage to reach our destination faster and happier.
